Bible Study Notes: The confident Mom, chapter 13 – Shaping your child’s life
Discipline is love, withholding is unloving. Discipline with action not emotions because no amount of anger or outburst will motivate them to change their behavior. Calmly sit down and explain what they did wrong, show them in the Word where the behavior wasn’t acceptable, then tell them the consequences you’re going to impose. Hug them and tell them you love them then let that be the end of it. Be clear and action oriented so they have learning experiences.
Constructive discipline needs clear guidelines with consequences based on the Bible. It’s about teaching them to please God, not us. God’s part is to change their inner attitudes; their job is to choose – good choice or bad choice. We get out of balance when we try to manage all three. Do your part, let God do his, and then let them choose.
Give them increasing authority over their own lives, letting them develop the skills to make good decisions. They will need to make some bad decisions so they can learn to think things through. They need the chance to express uniqueness and personality within acceptable rules.